The path to good Sex: How the female orgasm can train

To come never or only rarely to orgasm, as a typical woman problem. Many have come to terms with it. To many, FOCUS-Online expert Dania Schiftan, who has written a book with specific Exercises for women. Because of The female climax can be trained.

The absence of orgasm during Sex and listlessness – these are two of the most common topics that carry a lot of women to me. I am convinced that Good Sex can be learned. Under the Sex, everything holds together: self-satisfaction, arousal with a Finger(s), mouth, or Dildo, sex and more Sex includes all forms of sexual interaction and arousal on the entire body.

To be able to have a vaginal orgasm experience, is not happiness, but a matter of Practice. If we want to master a thing, we practice: Who wants to be good at playing the piano, taking lessons. Who wants to dance like a Ballerina, trained on a regular basis. This principle applies in all areas of life – not only in the Sex, we think that everything needs to unfold by itself.

Only one in every three women is coming during Sex regularly to climax

How wrong this assumption is demonstrated by the Figures: Only every third woman will come during intercourse regularly to the climax. It could be quite simple. Just like a Pianist with his fingers, must train, must be sensitized to the Vagina to Sex something. Good Sex is learned, and sexuality is learned. This means that Our sexuality is as good as it is developed. The better and the more diverse it has developed its own gender, the more you can use it – and the greater the pleasure in this is.

Many women are not aware that their sexuality – individually! – have developed, how they got there, where you are now, and what you can do in order to achieve something else, you want maybe. Every woman has an individual history of sexual development, and most of the patterns were developed in the kindergarten age. Many do not retain these into adulthood – what you are aware. You remember individual experiences, but of the entire learning process is not known.

About the expert

Dania Schiftan is a Swiss Sex – and psychotherapist. She has the book “Coming Soon – orgasm is a written matter of Practice,” a kind of training manual for the vaginal orgasm.

It is of course not a Must, to develop the own gender, but I would like to show that there are options to implement this: on the basis of simple, tangible Exercises. In practice, I don’t see often that many women do not know where the urine comes out, and let alone, how a clitoris is constructed. The more you know about his own body, the more conscious and targeted, you can touch.

The combination of tension and relaxation makes it

Starting from the clitoris, around the vagina, is also quickly clear that you can’t even talk about a vaginal orgasm, but the clitoris is the Moment in which the Vagina is penetrated, always with the party. An inseparable connection.

Also a very large role in the sexuality of the movement of the body plays. The explanation for this can be found once again in biology: Our autonomic nervous system controls around-the-clock and automatically all of the vital basic functions, which we can’t influence willingly – i.e. respiration, digestion, and metabolism. It consists of two structures: One active and one passive.

The active structure is responsible for the fight-or-flight(or Freeze) mode, which puts the whole body on alert, and always in combination with an extremely high level of muscle tension occurs. The passive part is responsible for factors such as Sleep, Relax, be Relaxed.

The paradox in sexuality: the sexual arousal, it needs both. For the build-up of sexual arousal, it is in need of physical tension, but this arousal to stop and enjoy, it needs relaxation. This middle ground between tension and relaxation can be achieved by the movement: the more the body is in motion, the more a kind of “Flow experience builds up”, in a sense, we know from the Jogging, in the time fly. Then the body is bleeding through so well, that the excitation maximum, and is distributed throughout the body felt.

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In addition to the body, however, the head must not be neglected – in this sense: many women claim to be able to sexuality only experience, if you can switch off the head. And make your mental relaxation as a quasi-condition.

A lot of women help detailed instructions, on the subject of grope

I’m looking at the whole thing exactly the opposite and return the chicken-and-Egg principle: A woman may switch off the head only if your body is enough of a move diverse. You go very much by the head, she is mentally at the next marketing concept, or is Ironing the Laundry, she is distracted. You looked at this woman on the body, were one to see and at some Places very much tension – for example, in the back, in the pelvis, but also in Breathing.

The more you choose to install but physical movement in the everyday, be it Jogging over lunch, or Yoga in the evening, the more you can relax on the activation of the body and such thoughts dispel. So you understand: What works in everyday life, it could also be transferred to the sexuality. To move during Sex to move around the holistic approach means that the head is free.

There is a specific set of instructions on how to do it is to look at the issue of grope. For many women, it is better to first study a manual to experiment with. Of course, but each is free to move the way you want to – there is no right or wrong. I find it very exciting understand, however, what I observe in sex therapy: The better a woman that you can also experience the activation of your body’s arousal and enjoyment, the quiet and pleasure, full of your spirit.

There are women who can’t find their fantasies in order, or even as a deterrent, but since they can be quite relaxed, because: the thoughts are free. Fantasies are always a result of what you do with the body. The change in the sexual patterns will change as a result of the fantasies.

Too much concentration on the Partner, to the own body

The topic of selfishness is in relation to the female orgasm is important, because women are often not aware that they are concentrated in the Sex, mainly on your Partner. What I do is pleasing to him? I’m doing it good enough? He finds it beautiful? Or he looks at me funny? And so on. With this constant focus on the Partner is, of course, clear that not much attention may lie in the woman herself.

Therefore, I motivate women to focus more on your own body and your own perception. The Great: This approach is completely value-free. He shows a way, how a woman can use her physical Potential more and your enjoyment can boost and gives a solid guide to reach the. Whether you want to or not, you must decide for yourself.