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Couples spend in these weeks, so a lot of time together, like rarely before.
What life has for impact on the relationship, psychologists and couple therapists in these times, therefore, very.
One thing is for sure: The Lockdown faced by both partners, unfiltered, with the own and the properties of each other.
Perhaps, therefore, now is the perfect time to do some behavior to rethink the pattern that these disturb the harmony in the relationship.
Including a distribution of roles in the giver and the taker, for example.
On the gut feeling listen to
When you get to Know it has sparked the same? He or she was charming, funny, respectful, and exactly on the same wave length?
Unfortunately, the first impression is not so meaningful, as you would have liked.
A better indicator is the gut feeling, the reports in the course of the follow-up meeting to the word, to give an indication of how well one does the other Person really.
However, this is ignored then. The hormones are just too much fire and flame, to make any objection apply.
Later, however, when one of the intuitive objections of the own gut feeling are heard from both already deeply enmeshed in the Give and the other Person has long grown accustomed to the Take, hardly more.
Because the more ingrained the behavior patterns of both parties are already, the harder it will be to be aware that something is wrong.
‘Love Panky’ has put together a catalog of features that should help its relationship to better assess.
So the giver and the taker ticking
The characteristics of a borrower:
- The borrowers in need always Support, but never or only very rarely a support for his Partner.
- A licensee can never do it right. To find fault with anything there is always.
- A licensee can be like the time when you reply to messages, and his Partner, often in a state of Uncertainty.
- A taker takes what he wants and not blocks, when he wants something. The ability to compromise and the seriousness of the needs of the partner take to stay on the track.
- The licensee thinks that he is a giver. Basically, he holds a large piece, and it’s important to him to be as gracious personality perceived
Image gallery: 20 sign that your relationship is at the end of
Characteristics of an encoder:
- The giver in a relationship is the girl for everything. Whether washing clothes, cleaning, cooking or shopping – daily tasks that need to be shared, he as a matter of course alone.
- A donor likes to pamper his Partner with smaller or larger gifts.
- To second order in time are the responsibility of the donor. He ponders and plans and can hope in the end that the lover enters, at least on the plans.
- For the donors, it is quite normal to pay for himself and his Partner. Let the time invite, it is hardly or not at all in question.
- Caresses of the Partner must initiate the encoder itself. Otherwise, he can wait a long time for this.
From unhealthy relationship break out patterns
Just for the people who can qualify as a donor can be identified, it is important to bring the unhealthy role distribution in the relationship to an end.
Everyone deserves to be treated with respect and treated equally.
To have a Partner, however, there is a constant feeling more to give, it can destroy the own self-esteem powerful. To prevent necessarily. If necessary, however, not necessarily by ending the relationship.
Before that, however, you can first try to work together on a way out. As for taker in a relationship at eye level is a long-term desirable.
Because it is much nicer to have the feeling to have an equal Partner on the page that behaves just calculating in the same way as we ask for it, but can surprise with his own will and nature again and again?
Source
- Love Panky: “15 Signs of a Taker in a Relationship: Are You a Taker or a Giver?”, abgerufe on 14.04.2020: https://www.lovepanky.com/love-couch/better-love/signs-of-a-taker-in-a-relationship
Larissa Bright Mouth
*The contribution of “giver or a taker?: These are the signs of relationship egoist” will be released by FitForFun. Contact with the executives here.